When we’re looking for a parking space why do we say we’re circling or going around the block? Blocks are not round. And why is it called a “round” of applause? Handclapping doesn’t form a geometrical shape. And that’s another thing, why is someone whose body has good form said to be “in shape?” We don’t specify what shape, so it could be any shape. I think a body is in the shape of, well, a body. Whether that body is physically fit shouldn’t matter. Unless of course, someone throws a fit over it. But that doesn’t really make sense either; one does not have to actually throw something to have a temper tantrum. I do know when babies engage in this sort of behavior we sometimes let them sleep it off. But was it ever “on” them in the first place?
Speaking of sleep, why do we say we “fall” asleep? Unless we collapse from sheer exhaustion, we don’t fall anywhere. It seems to me the only purpose of saying we fall asleep is to justify the expression of waking up. Because, while we may “wake up,” we may not necessarily “get up.” That would then mean we were still lying in bed. Then, that begs the question of why do we say we “lie” in bed? It makes it sound as though we can’t tell the truth unless we are standing up. Is that why we say, “he’s a stand-up guy,” if he is an honest man? And if that is the case, then why do judges “sit” on the bench. And why is it called a bench when it more closely resembles a desk and the judge is clearly seated in a chair? Shouldn’t we instead refer to him as a chairman? Although, unless the chair is permanently attached, he would not really be a chair-man, just a regular man.
But wait, if there are “regular” men does that mean there are unleaded men as well? And what about diesel men? I guess those would probably be called truck drivers. You know, guys like me with a lot of time for useless thought. And then, being lost in thought we miss our turn and have to circle the block.
Bruce A. Borders, author and songwriter, has over 500 songs and more than a dozen books. Over My Dead Body, The Journey, and Miscarriage Of Justice, his latest books, are available on Apple I-Pad®, Amazon Kindle®, Barnes & Noble Nook® and Sony Reader®, Kobo, Diesel Books, and Smashwords. Now also available in print at many online retailers or at www.bruceabordersbooks.weebly.com. The popular Wynn Garrett Series Books are now available on Barnes And Noble® at http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/?series_id=867526 See Bruce’s Smashwords Profile at www.smashwords.com/profile/view/BruceABorders