As you may have guessed, last week, I celebrated another anniversary of the day of my birth. (You really can only ever have one actual birthday).
My son called to wish me a happy birthday, and like many others, asked if I felt older – and that got me to thinking. I know, we’re all in trouble when I start the process of pondering these things! The answer to his question was no, I didn’t really feel older. I don’t really consider myself to be old. And that sometimes leads to problems.
How could that be a problem?
Well, I still think of myself as 20 years old, and still think I can do all the things I did then. And keep up the same life-style. There are still 24 hours in the day and I like to stay busy, oh, about 24 of them. My brain and body used to cooperate but lately, it’s a different story. Now, there is a war of sorts. My brain says, “Who needs sleep? Go for it.” But the rest of me has started objecting. So, while I may think I’m 20, at times my body feels like it’s pushing 80. That is definitely a problem.
So, I guess the full answer to the question is, I don’t feel older – it’s hard to feel older when you already feel 80!
But I don’t think I could change – even if I wanted to. For me, any amount of time spent sleeping, or some other passive activity, is time wasted – nothing gets done. I’m pretty sure no one on their deathbed ever said, “I wish I would have slept more.” No, it’s usually that they wish they had done more. And so, that’s what I’m doing – more. I’m told it’s unhealthy and may shorten my life, that I could run short of birthdays. That may be true. As I mentioned, that is one of the problems with birthdays - when they run out.
I guess if I have my choice I’ll go with just getting older. Somehow though, I don’t think it’s up to me. On one hand, I might see well over a hundred birthdays. Or, maybe I’ll be the first to say, “I should have slept more.”